questions...

Dunno why I'm still trying to do up my room when I'm already going to leave... maybe I want a cosy place to come back to... maybe I want to leave some things behind though I've already passed the point of no return...
There's still so many things that I want to do now, before I leave... But I'm afraid that the more I do, the more I've gotta leave behind... or am I doing all these now so that I can let go of them and put them down?

but do all things have to be made so clear before you can understand them? maybe not... Jesus spoke in parables so that to those who have the right intentions and right thoughts of the Kingdom of God, they will understand...

There are some things which can be said in a straight-forward manner, but why do we chose to "beat around the bush"? Why do we ask questions and give clues to the person whom we want an answer from, but never giving an answer - though we already have an answer in our mind?

Think it's because when the person gives us the answer that we're seeking for, we know that that person would have known and understood our thoughts and our intentions...

Maybe it's only in this way, that I can find comfort in knowing that I'm not making things up myself - that together, we can make this fairytale into a reality...

2 more days at work!

Just had a buffet lunch with my father at the Le Meridian hotel =) but I didn't bring along my camera so, sorry, couldn't let you all savour the food with us.. heh heh ;p

Anyways, the food was alright.. maybe I was hungry when I started the buffet but I thought the salad was nice.. hehe... they had more than greens by the way.... there's this seaweed chicken thingy which went surprisingly well with the greens.. the lamb chop was great cos it didn't have any foul smell to it and the meat wasn't tough at all... but the fish with butter sauce and almond was disappointing though... it looked good but the flesh was dry and not soft (maybe it was kept in the fridge for too long) and the butter paled far in comparison to the butter which was on my tenderloin steak when I dined at the Grand Hyatt... they had roasted beef, served sliced, but I'd prefer a piece of steak instead... got myself a cup of coffee at the end of the meal and the aroma was just great! I could drink it without anything added to it cos it's just so good on it's own! it has a very special aroma to it and doesn't have the sour aftertaste like some coffee does.... I think I have tasted that before somewhere but not in a coffee.... but it was a special cup =)

I think the deserts are worth a mention =) Love their cheesecake! I love cheesecakes by the way =) they also had these moose cake kinda dessert with mango, strawberry, grape and coffee flavours! it was in a semi-solid/molten state which gave it a special texture and the flavour was very rich! special mention for the Coffee flavoured one which tasted a bit like Bailey's.. hehe =) ... I tried the vanilla and sweetcorn ice-cream topped with walnuts and almonds! gotta say that it was the best vanilla and sweetcorn ice-cream I've had thus far... I could almost taste the whole sweetcorn in my mouth though there's no bits in them... pure ice-cream... their chocolate cake was rich in chocolate but would've been better if it's not that dry (maybe it's supposed to be that way but well, it's still good =))

Well, that's all for lunch =)

P.S. the time shown is kinda wrong though... hehe

Start of the week... 3 more days' of work!

Hello people!

It's the end of April! This year has been really great for me =) Think I've grown much more this year than the 2 years in Army... Think it's cos of the New Year's resolution... hehe..

Have accomplished quite a lot over the past week I could say... I've submitted my VISA applications to allow me to study in Germany, which if the application is successful, I've gotta go down to the embassy again.. hopefully for the last time..hehe...

Had meetings for the CG retreat and Thai missions too! things are starting to pick up so maybe this break from work is a good time to help prepare in these stuffs =)
Btw, I'm ceasing my service with my company at the end of the month.... gotta start planning what I'm gonna do with my time alr... feels like I'm ORDing a second time... haha

Anyways, also got to drop in on ppl who are mugging for their exams during the week! All the best for your exams! do take good care of your health at the same time =)

I see ppl knowing and doing what they want to do and I envy them... Sometimes I feel that I don't really know what I want for myself... But at other times I feel that that's the path that I should take... but I guess I'll still feel that way whichever path I choose so I'm gonna just look forward to this experience =) For now I'm hoping for August to come soon but I know that I'll be so dreading it when the day comes... Just hope that you will be there to push me on when the day comes...

missed...

Yay! Just completed all the lessons for driving yest! finally... hai~... guess these 3 days' worth of driving have damaged my senses... I'm like driving worse each day than the day before (or the practice before for that matter, cos I've got 2 slots in a day).... haha.. anyhow, at least now I wouldn't have to worry abt having my test date cancelled =)

Oh! and I've recovered the Sentosa post that I was working on few days back... yay! haha... somehow I didn't realise that there's a "Draft" tab before... I'm sure I was looking for that the other day... so do check it out below!

Well, sometimes we just keep searching for sth which is right in front of us but yet we do not realise it, do we? are we really missing it? or are we trying to search for "better" alternatives... or we're afraid of the commitment that it will bring...

Whatever it is, there's only this much I could do...
I can only say that I'm trying my best...

Afterlife...

Sorry I really tried to blog for the Sentosa trip but there seems to be some prob uploading the posts... I've tried 2 times alr and now I just can't bring myself to do it a 3rd time.. so for you all blog fans out there, you just gotta wait for another season to come =)

Anyways, had an emo chat yest evening.. haha... well, sorry about all the mindless ramblings... I know that someday I will see God's plans and purposes in this. But for now, I feel like I'm walking in total darkness, not knowing what's in front of me.... there's only a little source of light, size that of a pin-hole, that I'm walking towards.. it's the only assurance that I have, that every step that I take, You have placed a rock for me to set my foot upon... "Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path" Pslam 119:105 .

My prayer is for me to be ready whenever You decide to take me to be with You O Lord... To have no regrets in every step I take... Not just for me, but also for the people around me... And because of that, mine will be a celebration! And let the tears be tears of Joy because I will be in a far better place =) And leave the wailing and the cries to the "ruler of the kingdom of the air" (Ephesians 2:2) for he no longer has any control over me...
You may say that it's too early to talk about this kinda thing, but my friends, 1 Thess 5:1-2 tells us, "Now, brothers, about times and dates we do not need to write to you, for you know very well that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night." Will you think about afterlife only when death is at your doorstep? Wouldn't it, then, be too late to try to make the wrongs right? "What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?" Matt 16:26.

Just a penny worth of thought in light of things that've been happening around me recently...

May "The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace." Numbers 6:24-26

Amen.

Sentosa 9th April 08!!

Yay! I've found the draft!! Here it goes (supposed to be dated 13th April):

darn.... 2nd time writing this post... dunno what I pressed and everything's gone so dun be disappointed if this sounds stale.. haha... btw, how does the draft thing work? is it like just for show?

but anyways, I know this update is like 4 days late, but here it goes!!

Sentosa Trip 9th April '08

Rise and Shine!! Woke up to a Sunny Sunny Wednesday!! yeah! but was actually was supposed to wake up at like 7am to prepare the stuff for the outing but well, i gave in to the comfort of my warm and soft bed and just laid there till like 8.. haha... then it was a RUSH for preparations!! was busy packing everything and putting on the sunblock till i realised that it was like already 8.45 and I'm supposed to meet meng for breakfast!! the best part of it, I've still got my sandwiches to make... so it's like....!!!!!chop chop!! spread spread!! peel peel!!! cut cut!! pack pack!!!! *Phew**Phew* what a way to start the day... hhaahhaa

Anyways, guess I was still on time for breakfast in the end =) as usual, I'm the only one eating and mengsy will have her daily dose of Iced-Milo (oops... that's not supposed to be a secret right? hehe)

Anyways, felt that we should start the day right.... so when waiting for the bus to arrive, let's bring out the cameras!!
Dunno how to put captions... haha.. well, okay.. "Bus-Stop"


And as you would have guessed it, the bus that you are waiting for always comes after all the other buses come and we ended up waiting like 20 mins for it... i think... it felt that long... (not that I didn't enjoy the company, meng! =))

Anyways, reached Sentosa soon after and began our long march to Siloso beach!! Btw, I can't stand the Sentosa ppl standing at the train station smiling and waving to you as if they really cared if you're there or not.. but well, it's their job! smile!
"The march to Siloso!)


Finally found a sweet spot under the shades of some trees and let the tanning begin!! Thanks Mengsy for bringing a foldable mat for us to put our stuff =)
"The nice cosy spot we've found!"

however, after we started tanning, we realised that it'd be better if we used the mat for the tanning instead.. haha.. cos
we're like lying on the sand.... and when we've gotta reapply the sunblock lotion, we're like rubbing sand on our body.. *ouch*.. I'm like "can I just spray the lotion on and not rub it.. at all..." haha.. think the skin turned red not cos of the sun but cos the sand's scratching our skin.. haha...


"A little pile of sand which we used for our tanning purposes & mengsy with her new shoes!"

What's going to the beach without a dip in the water? hehe... but Zhi Jing didn't bring a change so he's gotta sit out on this one =( Anyhow, the waves that day were quite erratic.. sudden outbursts of waves will just appear out of nowhere (twice actually, when left the sea for a while with meng alone in the water) guess it was quite traumatic for her.. haha.. ok.. should laugh at this kind of things.. smile! =)

All these while...... Zhi Jing was looking after our stuff =) thanks! heez... anyways, he's not gonna stay dry forever... so mengsy sneaked up and pounced on him!! wahahaha!!
"Backstab!!!"

Finally, we're at the end of the sun tanning part =) we've tried to take many photos using our auto timers but well... the angle's always wrong.. haha.. but we're determined to get it to work!
" First shot!"
"Steady!! ready!! Shootz....."


See! we've finally got a decent picture!! wahahah... thanks for the tourist who helped us.. hahahahah...

"the Brothers!!"


We dropped by the Underwater World to meet Mr. turtle before setting off for lunch at Sub-Way!!


We were at Imbiah look-out and there's 3 ways down... the skylift, the Luch, and not forgetting.. walk! haha... ok.. missed out the bus but that wasn't on our mind at the time =) haha.. mengsy went on the skylift whilst Zhi Jing and I took the Luch!! Took a vid of it but just can't seem to upload it =(

Anyhow, Final finally of the day... the ride out of the island =)



Thank God for making the day so sunny and enjoyable =) haven't been to the beach for such a looong time!! and think the last time I went to the beach with church ppl is like years ago....

Guess I'm gonna miss all these soon... I just wanna create some good memories for me to bring along... I know it takes time but time is a luxury I don't have....
Come to think of it, time is a luxury we all don't have... So gotta treasure every moment we spend with each other!!

ZzZzZZzzzzZ

Stayed up last night to do something which I have procastinated for a very long time... hai~.... Now I'm half dead already....

Lucky (or unluckly) there's some problem with the server at my company... So I can steal some time to "rest my eyes"... hehe... but now it's just getting more and more irritating cos there's short spouts of time when the connection to the server will resume and I'll have to rush to input the details before the thing hangs again... so I'm like resting and waking every 2 mins... think that's just making me more tired....

lunchtime wasn't that great either... I ordered a PLATE of rice but the auntie gave me PACKET rice instead.... ok... I'll give it to her... maybe my brain signals aren't co-ordinating well with my tongue.... well, I've gotta give thanks that at least I've got rice to eat here right?

Not to mention there's still the stayover =) dun even think I can get out of there alive on saturday morning for my German class.... then there's Mission Trip meeting in the afternoon, which so happens to clash with the post-Israel trip meeting at 3pm.. why am I not surprised? well, life's all about choices right?

I kinda have this bad habit of envying ppl who can go overseas and tour... but the thing is when I'm actually on a trip myself, I don't feel as excited as I thought I should be... maybe cos everything's all well planned out and I dun have to worry about much... but I guess it's not how well the trip went, but instead, how bad it was that makes a greater impression on us.... that'd make us feel more dependant on each other... maybe that's why ppl go on backpacking... there's so much uncertainties, which is what makes the trip exciting... Backpack anyone??

Which Way?

Life's all about making choices.
Hate making choices... anyways, there's only 2 paths you can take... The easy way out, or the road less taken...

Think asking ppl around me is kinda been encouraging me to take the road less taken... "It's a good opportunity for you to go!", "Oh, Cool! Then I'll have someone to crash with when I go there!", "Since you have the chance to go, why still fret about staying? It's a whole new world out there!" Maybe I've been only asking ppl who'll give me this kind of answers. Makes me think that where I'm going is the place to be.

I dare not ask Someone who'd ask me to stay... I always feel hyped up when ppl tell me that I should go and "see the world"... But some ppl tell me, "Singapore's also good! You've got your friends and family here", "You'll always have a chance to go overseas if you miss it this time", "Do you know what you want for yourself?"
I'll stop and ponder about what's holding me back.
Yes, I know that "in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose" If so, show me the way! Teach me to Love! ... or how not to...

If I was Philip, I'd drag the whole boat-full of fishes with me when I leave my hometown... Until I can't drag it any longer, or You cut the rope off my hand... But if he'd done that, would he have witnessed the miracle of the 5 loaves and 2 bread that Jesus did when he fed the 5000? Cos Philip would had said, "Lord, there's enough on this boat for everybody" and not exclaim, "Eight months' wages would not buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!" and there'd be no story to tell...
Then again, what if I'm the little boy who brought along the "5 loaves and 2 bread" so that Your miracles can be shown? Will You, then, let me to bring this baggage along? Just this One?

I want so much for God to create yet another miracle in my life... With empty hands I come into this world, with empty hands I shall leave... But the Soul which was dead in me when I arrive, shall be filled with the Love and Joy You've given me when I depart...

Once again, I'd like to end off with yet another song from the same band... This band makes references to some bibiblical stuff in some of their songs, which are not that mainstream and it may be a turn off to some of you... But they do compose some nice "more-mainstream" music which I feel is worth a listen to =)
This song is called Warmness on the Soul... Think to the band this is just a love song... But the words and terms that are used are actually what we'd also use to explain our relationship with God... So, depending on how you look it it, it can be taken both ways...

Thanks for being there for me =)

God Bless!

Skin you alive!

Just had the most pissed off & fed-up moment of my life!!
i just can't get the skin thing to work!! Almost got to the verge of deleting this account and just create a new one cos i somehow saved the wrong stuff and the whole page turned into gibberish!!

But well, at least it got reverted to what it is now... *Phew*

If you're looking at my blog between 4.30PM and 5PM today you'd know what I'm saying... Hmmm... What's the probablility of that happening? Consider the 30min period during the afternoon... multiplied by the number of ppl who know this blog and the random surfers who'll "chance" upon my blog.. the probability of someone seeing the screwed-up blog should be about 0.00000000075693853.... considering there's about 1.32 Billion internet users in this world has access to the internet, then it'll amount to...... almost 1 person! and that's me!!

Wahahahahahaha?!?!?!

Stay tuned for more next time! Don't miss it again!

The return....

Hello! It's been a long while!
So many things have happened far and between... now I dunno where to start... haha
But come to think of it... it's only 2 major things.. the Israel trip, and uni...

Since I don't have any photos with me now, I shall tell you readers abt that on my next post =) hehe

To be or not to be... to stay or not to stay.. yep.. it's abt uni! just for the record, I was deliberating on whether I should go overseas to further my studies since like forever.. but things started happening since Feb that made me think more about this issue...

Of course, staying in Singapore is much more comfortable than going overseas.. not to mention, I'm not on a scholarship or anything... but I think it's time that I did something more with my life... jump into the unknown... take the leap of faith or whatever you may call it.... I couldn't had done it without some serious encouragements from the ppl around me, that I'm very grateful for =)

Just like life, opportunities come and go in a whiff... what's here today may not be there tmr... let alone the 5 - 7 years that I may be away for... with opportunities come choices, with choices comes cheers or regrets... I don't know which one will it be at the end of the day for me... but Someone once taught me that there's no point in asking,"what if I'd done differently back then?"... what matters is, what do I do about it now?

Anyways, preparations for going overseas are underway... and there's still a lot of unsettled matters... still waiting for the reply from the school so that I can start applying for a VISA and exit permit... still yet to settle my accomodation and what to bring over?!? think I still gotta wait for a month or 2 before I can book my air ticket cos there're no offers yet... just hope that oil prices don't rise during this time!

Anyways, I feel that these few months left here before I leave will be a good time for me to do some things for God's ministry here...

Just wanna share this song with You before I'm done with this post =)
It's not really a christian song though the title's "Dear God"... Enjoy =)

Take care and God Bless!

Tschüß!