Jetzt kann ich Deutsch!

Just thought I should start posting something here...

yeah.. definitely, lots have happened, lots have changed..

dunno where's the last time I left off, but well, for a start, I'm now qualified to be a student here in Germany! Just passed the language test for german.. so guess I'll be here in Aachen for the next 3 years then.. 

considering that I make more than 10% of the singaporean population here, my presence should make quite an impact yeah? haha.. but well, the fact is, this place is not so well known and ppl have to pick up another language and learn in another language.. a fact that turns lotsa ppl away.. nonetheless, there're still those who are willing to face these challenges, and definitely also those who overcame all these difficulties..

anyways, been showing a lady around lately.. she's here for a 2 mth's research project for the summer.. well, it's fun to have someone who's quite as free as you to go around places that you'll not go if you were alone.. i mean, what's the point of climbing to the top of the world and to realise that there's no one to enjoy the view with.. guess, at the end of the day, we just desire some company whereever we go, whatever we do, with someone who allows you to speak your mind without being judged or criticised =)

it has been great fun actually =) going to Düsseldorf, Maastricht, and also cycling to the Dreiländerpunkt (a point where Germany, Belgium, and the Netherlands meet) met some great people and enjoyed some great sights. anyways, still got lots to plan and planned ahead... might be going to catch a fireworks show this evening if the weather holds up, and if the bus uncle is gonna let us bring the bikes on board the bus, cos there's be no bus back after the fireworks... also gonna go Berlin and London on the next 2 weekends after this.. it's gonna be great =)

well, right after London, my dad will arrive in germany, and my mom and sisters will arrive few days later... guess we'll still bump into each other in this small town, and maybe even during the rest of our trips.. and that's where our paths would part again.. maybe it's good that my family's coming over this time, so I do not have to see you leave.. well, at least we've seen this coming.. ppl come and go in our lives.. especially when you're living overseas, these things will happen, and I can be sure that this will not be the last of seeing ppl leave..

oh well, just live each day to it's fullest.. how easy for one to say.. 

moving on, my family will be renting a car here for this trip.. gonna go to the neighbouring countries.. luxembourg, belgium, netherlands, france, switzerland, and of course, quite a bit of south germany... but planning is really not my thing though.. got so much to think of... first gotta know where to go, and when we'll get there, and then gotta find a suitable comfortable accomodation, also gotta research on the 'to-dos' at all the places.. guess my parents will be okay if things are not as 'in-order' as it should be, but who likes the hassle of things going wrong anyways? and if you do not know anything about the place you are going, all the things you see there will just be buildings and trees and rivers... 

got some freetime now on my hands.. so gotta equip myself for the trips then..

oh, and since I've passed my german exam, I should start attending german services here, as a means of staying in touch with the language.. like killing 2 birds with 1 stone =) will still be attending the chinese fellowship group though... serving at the fellowship has been going well, and we've got some things going on... we're embarking on a year-long bible reading project, and also just started a cell group for the guys (they had one for the ladies since quite sometime ago).. 

guess it all started at a revivial during a church camp in June.. seems like the other six from our fellowship group who attended this camp are still going on well.. I've got a little more bucking up to do I guess.. not that the few weekends that I'll be away is going to help.. well, let's just see how things are gonna turn out.. still a lifetime more to go..

it's weird, how reading your blog actually made me feel so 'real' again.. can't really put it down in words though.. studying in a land so far away, cycling 120km in half a day, experiencing the snowing here.. all these feel so mediocre and minute as compared to hearing from you again..

I want to leave all these things behind me.. but maybe out of my youthful passions, I've given much more than I could have.. will our paths ever cross each other again? what will happen then?

there's no way I'm going back there again, but a part of me is still lingering... it's not up to me, it really isn't.. but nothing could make me feel so 'real' and 'alive'..

Selfish but true,
now I just need someone to pull me through.
More often than not,
is this memory too hard to be forgot.
Good, were the times gone by,
but at least we still did give it a try.
Once and for all,
just let it go, and let it fall...

The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." 

Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. 
  But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 

 The man said, 
  "This is now bone of my bones 
  and flesh of my flesh; 
  she shall be called 'woman,' 

  for she was taken out of man."

Genesis 2:18-23

I was in church one Sunday...
the service started out as usual with singspirations...
and the church choir presented a song unto the Lord thereafter...

It was the Sunday after the 'Marriage Conference' that the church held...
the pastor walked to the front, and invited all the married couples upfront...
each of the man is to present a rose to his partner...

It was such a beautiful scene...
tears started rolling down my cheeks...

tears of Joy for the couples? tears of envy? tears of sadness?

I don't know...

All I know is, marriage is not just a matter of the heart...

Time and time again, I thought that Love could surpass everything... 
I tried to live by that...
only to find out what a fool I am, with this wishful thinking...
for I'm the only one who believes in that...

Say no more... Feel no more... Do no more... Think no more...

this Valentines day will just be another Feburary the 14th...
a day on the calander...
a day when Lovers reconcile...
a day when Couples rekindle their love...
a day when the Singles remind themselves of their lonliness...

how easy it is to fall in love and yet not be in love...
but how then can I rid myself of this thorn?
for if hate can only be driven out by Love,
then, will hate, be the only remedy for the Lovelorn?

Alles Gut, Endes Gut

It's the start of 2009, and needless to say, an end to 2008...

2008, a year that so many things happened for so many of us... guess 2008's also a turning point in my life...

well, 2008 kinda started with a burst of emotions, with so many things bringing us together.. when I broke the silence, it was when the waves of highs and lows started to pour in...

so many times I've hoped for an answer... so long I've waited... even till the day I left for this foreign land...

I've given my all, I've done what I could... maybe it's just not meant to be, maybe not yet... I know, you've done what you could too... but at least for now, I know that I'm not someone you need right now... 

But at the end of the day, I really thank God that we came out of this with a better friendship than that which we had before... that finally, the pressure is lifted off... that finally, there's no more expectations... 

"You don't own her, you can only Love her"
if only I had the heart and determination of the friend who told me this... but there's just so many externalities...

at the end of the day, can you feed yourself with Love? I don't even know what I'm gonna do for a living for crying out loud... what else can I give? make a starving wife out of the poverty I'm in?

sad but true, that's the reality of life... I've tried the irrational side of Love, and guess what? wake up and smell the coffee! Leave the "Happily ever afters" to the fairytales....

okay.. sounds like I'm pissed off right? well, not really.. it's kinda the things that we have to learn sometime in our lives... but as we've said before, "Glad it was with you that I went through this with =)

it's 2009 and I'm leaving the rest of this Fairytale to God to write (and yes, I still do believe in a Fairytale ending =))... whether or not Cinderella will turn up, it's still too early to tell... as for now, we've gotta first get Prince Charming his White horse to get him on the way =)

still struggling with Uni applications, at least with a bit of progress..

Attended a new church, which so happens to be nearby my place too.. it's an international church but most of the people there are Africans.. we all know their passion for music and it's just great to be part of their praise and worship..

School's starting again tomorrow... don't know what to expect... 

2009's sure gonna be another whole different year... let's wait and see...

Through the eyes of a child...

Hello!! wondering what I've been doing the past few weeks? heez... I've just experienced the first Snowfall in my life!! yeah!! haha.. Having lotsa fun with the classmates here.. going to the Christmas market here ever so often but never bored out by it cos there's always food to eat!! haha... well, the pictures are updated at the photoblog so feel free to check it out =)

starting to get lotsa homework to do also though... well, cos there're also ppl in the class who want to go back to their countries earlier we're gonna have the exam earlier...

Just for the record, I'll be going back to Singapore this December!! from the 12th till the 30th... so catch me then! haha =P

well, the time is getting short to apply for the school of my choice... think I'll just try to apply for all the Universities with the subjects I'm interested in first... at least that pushes my decision making-process back by another half a year or so.. haha...

well, everything in life is just so complicated ain't it? so many things to consider, so many causes, so many effects... 

If only the world was much simpler... If the word 'Love' only contained these 4 letters...

afraid to move forward, yet at the same time, afraid to give up... fear, as we call it...

maybe there are indeed times when we try too hard... maybe there are times when, indeed, our best is not enough, or in someways, too much.. something so simple yet seemingly so complicated...

Why did we make it so hard? this life is so complicated until we see it through the eyes of a child...

Land away from land; home away from home

Hello everyone!

Part of the updates this time will be here instead =) go take a look ba!
http://www.ssag.de/index.php?text_cat=activities&text_cont=klw08

Well, I'm into my 3rd module in the Deutschkurs now...
Still trying to figure out what I what I want to do in the future..
Thinking of things that are beyond my control...

Just had another of the 'can't get out of my own dream' kinda dream.. kinda scary though.. think maybe this could be what coma patients go through... which is why they really need the will to want to even wake up from a dream they know they are in...

I fought on.. after trying to wake up for the upteenth time, I finally came back to this world...

It's the 2nd of this kinda dream that I've had...
Kinda left some things on a bad note before I went to sleep last night..
once again, we learn to treasure everyday of our lives... the people, and the things which make it special...

There will NOT always be another day to love...
There will NOT always be another day to make things right...

Imagine a day when someone's not there anymore.. what difference will that make for you?

What's this feeling?

Uni's just started for the students here.. Seeing them all running around, being in the company of friends, having a purpose in life... makes me wonder, what am I exactly doing here? at that moment I felt so outcast form this place... had this feeling for the first time but I dunno what it is... it's only when I talked to ppl online today that I realised that this is what lonliness felt like..

lonliness is having no one to share the best and worst in life with, having no one hear you when you shout at the top of your voice, having no one walking beside you on the same path that you're on... never did I understand this feeling till now.. little did I know that I'd find the antidote at the same time..

Dunno if you still remember the agreement we made... that we'd have a time for us this day, every week.. know that you've been trying... trying to listen, trying to understand, trying to care, trying to change..

in this, there're no obligations, no to-do's, no memos, no datelines..
just a desire that we find in us for the fufilment of what we need...

Thank you O'Lord, for Your guidance...